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Monday, February 26, 2024
Home Leaders Community Three Kinds of People that Fill Every Church

Three Kinds of People that Fill Every Church

7

The three kinds of people in every church:

  • The energizers: their presence makes us feel better, buoys our spirits, and fills our tanks.
  • The regular folksthey may not buoy our spirits, but they don’t demoralize us either. They make up the largest group.
  • The drainersthey sap our joy and can ruin our day.

The main difference between the energizers and the drainers are their expectations of us.

The energizers don’t place great expectations on us. The drainers do.

We don’t measure up to the drainers’ expectations. Either our preaching or counseling or leading or availability is not enough. These subtle unmet expectations may not be overt, but when we’re around these people, we feel their unspoken disapproval.

Edwards pens these profound words:

When our credo becomes “I am as you desire me,” we have lost the very thing that will enable us to minister effectively: our authenticity.

Edwards rounds out his thoughts with three insights into how Jesus responded to His drainers.

  • First, Jesus retreated from His drainers to refresh Himself and seek God. He regularly sought renewal.
  • Second, Jesus balanced His drainers with His energizers.
  • Third, Jesus didn’t allow the drainers to deter Him from His plan and purpose.

Although Jesus practiced a rhythm of renewal and time away from His drainers, He never got rid of them.

He still had to contend with them, just as we pastors must do in our churches.

Not everyone liked Jesus. Not everyone will like us. But God’s grace gives us what we need to serve even the most draining drainers.

For an in-depth look at people pleasing in the church, consider my third book: People Pleasing Pastors: Avoiding the Pitfalls of Approval Motivated Leadership.

Charles Stone
Charles Stonehttp://charlesstone.com/
Both Charles and his wife Sherryl  have a heart for pastors and pastors’ wives. They have taught hundreds of pastors and their wives in the United States, Canada, Nicaragua, Colombia, and Mexico. Charles earned an engineering degree from Georgia Tech, a Master of Divinity from Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, and a Doctorate of Ministry from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School. He just began another master’s degree in Neuroleadership. He’s also an avid Georgia Tech Yellow Jacket fan. He has been professionally trained in these areas by these organizations: Life Coaching through the Professional Christian Coaching Institute Strategic Planning through Ministry Advantage (certified) Vision Clarity through the Church Unique Process (certified) Conflict Management through Peacemakers Charles is the author of three books – Daughters Gone Wild – Dads Gone Crazy (Thomas Nelson, 2007), 5 Ministry Killers and How to Defeat Them (Bethany House, 2010), and People Pleasing Pastors: Avoiding Pitfalls of Approval Motivated Leadership (Inter-Varsity Press, January 2014). He loves to fish, ride his recumbent bike, and go to the movies with Sherryl, his wife of 33 years (he always gets the jumbo bag of popcorn with a free refill). They have three grown children: Heather, age 30, who is married to Charlie; Joshua, age 29, who is married to Deborah; and Tiffany, age 26, who lives at home. One canine also makes his home with them in Spring Grove, Illinois.

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